"The Daily Nonsense report” showing on http://BruceDowns.Diaryland.com is just what the name implies, just nonsense. I update this nonsense everyday with links to a wide variety of weird, funny, strange, and just plain entertaining sites that the Internet, so frequently, provides us. On occasion I may feature links that doesn’t necessarily meet the previously mention criteria but are my personal thoughts and observations. I do put witty taglines on this nonsense and mail them to your mother on occasion, especially when you have been bad. So have fun, make comments, and come back often.

07/16/2004 - 5:54 a.m.
Job Predictor
Enter your name, and the Job Predictor will tell you your ideal job.

And it seems to be very accurate. For example, for Bruce Downs, my ideal job is a Supermodel. Maybe if I had some plastic surgery I guess.

07/16/2004 - 5:50 a.m.
Friday Fun, Pop.
Catch bubbles. [Flash game]
(via www.littlefluffy.com)

07/15/2004 - 6:46 a.m.
AWOL™ Machine. No Hangover - No Carbohydrates!
Is this the ultimate party toy?
AWOL - A Better Way To Enjoy Your Favorite Spirit!

AWOL, which is an acronym for Alcohol With Out Liquid™, is the brainchild of 30 year old Dominic Simler (pictured below), who discovered that by mixing spirits with pure oxygen, a cloudy alcohol vapor can be created which can be inhaled.
This I would like to see for myself.
Finally, a solution to the two greatest problems today's drinkers have: hangovers and calories. This is the dieters dream. this is the Atkins diet alcohol and diabetes alcohol, low carbohydrates, low calorie and low sugar alcohol.


07/15/2004 - 6:38 a.m.
ladies and gentleman our new American Idol!!! Well at least she tried.
Well, at least she remembered the rockets red glare part. Yes, I do feel sorry for her but at least it’s not as bad as Rose Barr’s version.

07/14/2004 - 6:15 a.m.
Unfortunate URLs
All of these web addresses appear to be obscene, but I assure you each one is perfectly innocent. Many are churches and Christian bookstores. All were well-intentioned when purchased, but perhaps a little more thought could have been put into them. (Hint: Have a child read your URL aloud. If anyone is going to find the dirty word by accident, it will be them.)

What Unfortunate URLs can you find?

07/14/2004 - 5:43 a.m.
We doesn't have much time.
All systems gone, prepare for down-count. (.mpg)

07/13/2004 - 6:25 a.m.
Not mentioned in your Defensive Driving class that could help.
Practical advice from Popular Mechanics: How To Foil An Alien Abduction.

You're driving along a dark, deserted road when suddenly a UFO appears overhead in front of you. You pull over just as a beam of light radiates from the craft, and you can see five gray-colored aliens descending in the beam. You get out of your car for a closer look. Uh-oh! The aliens are rapidly moving toward you, and you think that you're going to be abducted. What should you do?
Can you think of other items that drivers should know that are not taught in defensive driving classes?

07/13/2004 - 6:08 a.m.
I dreamt I was speeding into oncoming traffic…
While on vacation, Lisa and I rented Steven King’s movie Dreamcatcher, a pretty good movie, if you are into Sci-Fi, Steven King, or farting. I’m certain you’ve seen those “authentic” Native American dream catchers in people’s homes. It was my (probably mistaken) impression that these were specific to the Lakota tribe, although other tribes seem to be cashing in on them faster than casino chips.

If you aren’t familiar with them, they are supposed to represent spider webs that snare our nightmares, but allow our good dreams through by touching the rays of the first morning light. Very nice.

Yesterday, I spent my first day back from my vacation taking a defensive driving class required by my employer. Well what worries me is… I saw a dream catcher dangling from the rear view mirror of a moving vehicle. Think about that. Are people actually achieving REM while driving? That explains a whole lot. Maybe they too should take a defensive driving class.

07/12/2004 - 6:36 a.m.
What's Wrong With This Picture?
This photo is from Yahoo News, with this caption:

US President George W. Bush (C) makes remarks joined by Mel Martinez (L) and Robert Deposada (R) during a drop-by briefing for The Latino Coalition.(AFP/File/Tim Sloan).

My answer to the what is wrong with this picture:
The question from the press to Dubya was, What does 1 + 2 = ?

07/12/2004 - 3:45 a.m.
Or are they just dating?
Kerry + Edwards: Let's get it on [Flash]
Wait, I thought that both Kerry and Edwards are against gay marriage. Many of you (screanwriter?) may be surprised that I would post something that made fun of Kerry/Edwards well I guess this makes me an equal opportunist.

07/12/2004 - 3:43 a.m.
I smell a master's thesis.
Too much time looking at staple? Simon Cox is trying to figure out what the perfect angle for a staple between several sheets of paper should be. Proof that there can be beauty in every little office thing you do.

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Any rebroadcast, reproduction, or other use of the pictures and accounts of this nonsense without the express written consent of Major League Baseball is prohibited. Sanitized for your protection. Do not read while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. One size fits all. No user-serviceable parts inside. I do not carry cash. No wagering. Void where prohibited by law.